Forgiveness is a Choice

April 2, 2012 3 Comments »

Photo Credit: David Castillo Dominici /

This is day two of the 30 day challenge! Yesterday, I began to talk about forgiveness. Much to my surprise the post attracted more traffic than ever before. The sensitivity of the topic and the overwhelming response has caused me to continue to write about it today.

One thing is for sure, at some point in our lives we will experience betrayal. If you are reading this post, you most likely have already experienced it. If we consider that someone has betrayed us or violated our trust, it’s because we considered that person a confidant of sorts. As a result of the betrayal or the violation of our trust we then experience pain. Our initial reaction might be to shut down and cross the person off of our list. We might choose not to talk to them or not interact with them. Unfortunately, that still leaves the issue unresolved.

Ignoring the person or the situation does not take away the fact that we are hurting. Then the question resounds loud within our soul.

If I was the one wronged why should I forgive?

  •  By forgiving you will be delivered from the hurt or resentment that you are feeling.
  • By forgiving you regain control.

What happens if I do not forgive?

A couple of months ago I heard a pastor speak at a church leaders conference and he described choosing not to forgive in this way:

Not forgiving someone is like you personally drinking a glass of poison and expecting the other person to get sick.

If we do not forgive then we run a great risk of living an unhappy life. I do not know about you but I want to be able to live a long happy and healthy life.

The Mayo Clinic Staff list a couple of health benefits that follow suit in forgiveness:

  • Healthier relationships
  • Greater spiritual and psychological well-being
  • Less anxiety, stress and hostility
  • Lower blood pressure
  • Fewer symptoms of depression
  • Lower risk of alcohol and substance abuse

 Where do I go from here?

Forgiveness is a choice. You must decide whether or not you are going to exercise the option of forgiving the person who hurt you. Forgiving someone is not a sign of weakness but rather a sign of strength. Forgiving someone does not minimize the fact that they hurt you; however, it helps you heal from that hurt.

When you’re hurt by someone, identify how that person hurt you and do not place yourself in the position to be hurt again. Just because you have forgiven them does not mean that you trust the person completely. Be smart about it, forgive, forget, and let it go.

By practicing forgiveness, you are the main benefactor. Not only does it bring forth certain health benefits but you will also be able to experience peace and joy again. Today break loose from resentment, anger, hurt, and pain by acting like Jesus and forgiving in the middle of your pain.


Do you feel that your pride sometimes gets in the way of you being able to forgive?


Jonathan Iguina (37 Posts)

Jonathan is the author and founder of He is a husband, a father, and a pastor. He loves Jesus, his family, writing, and playing golf.

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    Great blog! For me it depends on the situation… honestly sometimes pride arises when I feel like, “Oh well I’d rather not face that person and anyway life goes on” lol. But then again I know thats not a christian attitude and in order to move forward forgiveness is key. So yes, lets set aside our prideful attitudes and forgive to be forgiven!
    Forgiving someone does not minimize the fact that they hurt you; however, it helps you heal from that hurt. By practicing forgiveness, you are the main benefactor (Iguina, 2012)

    • Jonathan Iguina

      Thanks for the compliment. You’re right, pride will get us everytime if we are not careful. May God continue to teach us to be like him. Blessings!

  • Reinasalsa007

    I have to say yes. It seems like when one is betrayed continuously and forgive the person over and over I think there comes a time when one just wants to throw in the towel and cross that person off their list. I understand that God tells us to turn the other cheek however I only have two cheeks… lol